Please forgive the somewhat off-topic bent of of this comment. I am a Canadian polio survivor. Compared to many polio victims, I have been so very, very lucky. Yet polio has always been a part of my life and polio has shaped me as a man and as a father.
I had polio as a 9 month old child in 1954. I suffered paralytic polio & was given little chance to live & have spent weeks in hospital. When I did survive my parents were told I would never walk. I have one leg shorter than the other & my left side is weaker & less robust than my right. I proved the original doctors wrong.
As a child I walked, I ran, I hiked in the woods near my home. As a child I was picked on and bullied by other children because I was ‘crippled’. I was embarrassed to wear short pants because other kids laughed at me because my left leg was shorter and much thinner than my right and I had to wear a build-up on my shoe.
I remember my dad then (as he is still is) as a man of infinite patience who took a morning off work at least once every month to take me for as long as I was a child to see the doctor for a scheduled appointment. I remember that hospital waiting room, and the hallway, and the treatment rooms as though they were yesterday.
Since I was a boy the taunting was probably even worse because boys are expected to be athletic. I had an absolutely wonderful polio doctor who looked after me during my entire childhood and adolescence and carried out the required surgeries and without him I would never have accomplished what I have.
Although other doctors told me at that time that I would never be athletic, Dr. Murphy told me that I should never let other people’s expectations determine what I thought I could do. So I played basketball and football on the school’s intramural teams – I wasn’t the best player but I was far from the worst – but I was always the last person selected in pickup games.
Dr. Vincent Murphy
When I was 14 the leg length discrepancy had gotten to be bad enough that epiphyseal stapling was carried out on the affected leg. I remember being in the hospital for two weeks to have the staples put in and I remember my dad coming every single day during his lunch break and I can still remember nearly every single one of those visits.
I carried the staples in my left knee for two years, and I still insisted on playing school sports and hiking – but the procedure worked and my legs after were essentially the same length, although I still tell people that I am two years shorter than I should be. It was another two week hospital visit after two years to have the staples removed and again dad was there everyday.
When they were out Dr. Murphy smiled and told me to take it easy for a few weeks until I got back to normal. Less than two months later I walked 40 miles in a charity walk and was one of the first 10% of finishers. I recall Dr. Murphy just smiling again when I told him, and saying (with a grin) that I never had followed doctor’s orders.
He then laughed and said “Well you know you’ll probably never be an Olympic Athlete”. He was right about that one prediction but like most polio survivors I refused to let polio win so I took up cycling and hiking and climbing in the mountains, which I still do, to a much lesser extent even today.
Dr. Murphy passed away in 2010 and even though I hadn’t seen him for over 35 years his passing was like a body blow.
I didn’t even know until after he died that he had been a War hero, being shot down over Germany and spending time in a POW camp. From his determination I guess I learned that Polio survivors DO NOT give up.
I now suffer from Post-Polio Syndrome. It is real. There are thousands of polio survivors like me who also suffer but until recently were not taken seriously. Even now it is hard to convince many people that PPS is an actual affliction.
I feel sadness and dread about the recurrence of polio in some nations. But what I feel more is ANGER. Anger that children, little boys and mostly little girls are now being exposed to this scourge. What angers me even more is that the thousands of children, mostly girls who are being FORCED to suffer the ravages of polio NOW because of radical Islamists in Pakistan, Afghanistan, & Nigeria who refuse to allow the vaccination that will prevent the death or lifetime of suffering that hundreds of thousands of polio victims suffered.
I have lived a good physical life that was essentially normal by all standards, and my suffering was minimal, yet I would gladly suffer again if I knew these children could be saved by my suffering.
I am ANGRY that today’s children must fear what I had hoped was eradicated.
I am ANGRY that children are suffering because of STUPIDITY.
POLIO MUST BE DEFEATED.
It must be ERADICATED from the face of the earth FOREVER.
To Dr. Murphy : Thank you sir.
September 1, 2011
For a totally realistic, truthful, and non-flinching look at fatherhood today I strongly recommend the following two CDs:
- Any Man in America by Blue October (and in particular the title song)
- Our Stolen Children by Peter van de Voorde (from Australia – this CD is very hard to get but I highly recommend listening to it if you can)
If you are a divorced father – and in particular a divorced single father – these CDs will strike to the very heart of you, rip out your emotional suffering, and lay it bare for the world to see.
January 1, 2014
During my custody battle I was forced to pay thousands of dollars for a “court appointed child custody expert”, who was a practicing Psychiatrist and a Professor of Psychiatry at a local well known university, to decide what the “best interests of the children” were in determining the custody mandate. Among his many clearly prejudiced actions during the course of months of interview sessions was one memorable afternoon when, with myself and my two young sons together for the interview, he directly told my sons “Your father has severe mental health issues which clearly make your lives Hell, but I shall make sure that ends soon”. (Nothing of the sort is even remotely true.) This resulted in one of my sons breaking down in inconsolable crying. This “expert” then wrote in his report that I caused my children severe distress during the interview.
This “court appointed custody expert” was anti-father from the start. In the end he wrote a 40 page report saying I was one of the worst fathers he had ever seen, quite a shock to the dozens of references I provided who all said totally the opposite. The report he wrote was full of hundreds of factual errors which were easily checked, as well as hundreds of misstatements, again easily checked (I should call them lies, but I’ll be polite). I wrote a 45 page rebuttal listing and explaining in detail all the errors and misstatements; and documenting the actual facts, providing detailed directions as to how my statements could be verified. I submitted this to the court as part of my case. Before my case came to court this “expert” died. (Karma?) When time came for the report and rebuttal to be read in court, the judge said since the report author was dead and unable to defend his report my rebuttal was non-admissible and she would accept his report as written.
My day in court? HAH!
July 9, 2010 Based on a News Report from the Calgary Herald on this day.
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before….
- Man and woman with children get divorced.
- Mother gets custody – biological father gets support payments.
- Mother limits access to children – biological father rarely sees them.
- Mother takes children and moves far away – essentially denying biological father the right to see his children at all.
- Biological father forced to continue paying support – mother forced to do nothing to ensure access to father.
- Mother moves in with no-good low-life – biological father still forced to pay support.
- No-good low-life is called “stepfather” and is allowed unfettered 24 hour access to children while biological father rarely if ever permitted to see them – either by mother or “family justice” system.
- Mother’s no good low-life, also known as “stepfather” murders children, denying forever the biological father’s right to see his children.
- Everyone weeps for mother, nobody cares about biological father – in fact nobody even tells him about the fate of his children.
Oh, you have heard that one before? Then just wait for the next chapter
- Socialist feminazi lobby groups team up with government, social agencies, and family justice system to in general further restrict ALL biological fathers’ access to their very own children claiming that studies show children are far safer with their mothers after divorce than with their “fathers”.
- They cite stories like the one above as proof, taking no notice of the fact that it was the mother’s low-life boyfriend ‘step-father’ who murdered the children NOT the biological father.
- The media agrees profusely and produces “specials” featuring socialist feminazi spokeswomen supporting the new measures.
- The great herds of sheep (also known as the general population) nod sagely in agreement and go back to grazing.
Go back to “Stop me …. ” above and repeat.
I was recently reading an article where a man was concerned about his ex-wife (who, unsurprisingly had been awarded sole custody and full residency) constantly doing everything possible to vilify him and to alienate his children from him. He, on the other hand, was doing whatever he could to make sure the children (for whom he was graciously granted ‘access and visitation’ by the Courts for the traditional meager couple of weeknights and one weekend a month) saw NEITHER parent as bad or evil and explained that “mommy and daddy have decided not to live together anymore but we both love you just as much as we always did.”
He was worried that with the children constantly, daily, and unceasingly living with their mother painting him as evil, as hating the children , and as the cause of the divorce, they would grow up fully believing it. The so-called ‘expert’ who was writing the article said that the father should not worry. “Children are smart enough to see around the lies and they will “ALWAYS KNOW WHO THEIR REAL PARENT IS.”
Well, I am here to tell you – IT JUST AIN’T SO.
This post is in response to a recent article titled:
It is unfortunately and tragically true that there are people who are genuinely caught in a gender identity crisis. These people are not perverts or weirdos or any type of lower human. Nature sometimes makes mistakes and in these few cases nature has mistakenly put the wrong emotional, mental, and psychological software together with wrong body hardware. There are over 7 billion people on the planet – it should not be surprising that this happens from time to time. The people that truly suffer from this dimorphism are not to be scorned, hated, or even pitied – they need to be supported and helped (medically and surgically if necessary) to be able to aspire to the same sense of self-identity, self-worth, and self-happiness that everybody else wants for themselves. For those who truly suffer this crisis it is a huge, extremely brave step to publicly reveal themselves and a frequently heart-rending revelation for their family and friends. I know – some of them are very near and dear to me.
Having said that I do agree that this ‘epidemic’ of such cases in prisons and in various other public institutions does need to be seriously and thoroughly and professionally investigated to determine its validity, and if found valid, some serious mental health decisions and programs need to be started. The cost – i.e who pays for it – is a TOTALLY DIFFERENT but none-the-less VALID question – especially given the prison situation and the fact that many if not most of these people are in their current situation because of bad decisions they themselves made and need to take responsibility for.
The real question that arises is: should taxpayers fund (and are they morally and/or legally obligated to do so) the medical and potential surgical expenses for the cases in the prison population when there are probably MANY MORE cases of similarly afflicted people NOT IN PRISON, who will never be in prison, who are attempting to lead their lives the best they can with all the physical and psychological issues and suffering they endure and live with on a on a daily, never-ending basis. Unfortunately the funds are not limitless – should we be spending them on people who are good, contributing citizens in every sense, but who suffer a condition not of their own making or should we spend the funds on those who, whilst in many cases have the same condition, have made personal choices that have negatively impacted others and society in general?
Even as I have stated it, the situation Is grossly over-simplified – I am aware of that. However I am also aware and a fervent believer that one portion of the population cannot be, and does not deserve to be, shunted aside and demonised because some of their members have made detrimental self choices that impacted society negatively as a whole. Otherwise why not just set up a whole new class of ‘lazar hospitals and colonies’ and force the inhabitants to walk around with a bell around their neck.
“I’m sick of being a baby factory that produces more men, that in the future will subjugate me,” she says on the video posted to her still posted YouTube channel.
“So the only answer to that is to kill male babies and just kill any man you see in the street.”
The obviously unhinged feminist goes on to say: “We want the species to go on but only with women in it. So that’s what we have to do.”
For the story of the rest of this obviously repulsive and sickening (and Feminist approved) diatribe of pure unvarnished hatred see the Canada Free Press : CFP
Or if you just want to be repulsed and vomit up your lunch go straight to the video: #KILLALLMEN
I notice that our Prime Minister – Little Potato – has magnanimously thrown wide open the doors of Canada to ANYBODY and EVERYBODY from WHEREVER AND WHATEVER BACKGROUND, to feel absolutely free to enter the country by whatever means they can – legality not being an issue – whence the taxpaying citizens of Canada will provide them with FREE MEDICAL CARE (superior in fact to that which taxpaying Canadians are begrudgingly entitled to – especially if you are a MALE CANADIAN) , FREE LANGUAGE TRAINING, FREE HOUSING, Generous WELFARE PAYMENTS, FREE JOB FINDING ASSISTANCE – essentially : COME ONE, COME ALL – the people of Canada will joyfully bend over backwards to give up everything they have ever worked for to GIVE IT TO YOU – AND BETTER YET – YOU WILL NEVER HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TO EARN IT!!
MR. TRUDEAU – I am a 60+ unemployed CANADIAN CITIZEN with CANADIAN roots going back 7 generations, who has worked all his life. I raised two children as a SINGLE FATHER without ONE SINGLE CENT from anybody. Because of the Family Courts I paid my ex hundreds of thousands which she took & then dumped the kids on my porch. Because of my age, my health, my gender, & the fact that I am a wight Canadian I CANNOT get another job although I applied for 167 in 2016, all of which I am easily qualified for. However I am not eligible for any ‘special’ government employment incentives because I am not a refugee, nor a minority, nor a woman. I currently owe over $800,000 COMPLETELY & TOTALLY because of YOUR FAMILY COURTS & I have ABSOLUTELY ZERO chance of paying off my debts even if I find another job & work every single day UNTIL I DROP DEAD. PLEASE TELL ME WHY anybody from outside of Canada, who has not contributed ONE CENT to Canada, deserves help MORE THAN ME & THOUSANDS of other similar Canadians?
MR. TRUDEAU – you are NOT my Prime Minister and YOU DO NOT speak for me.
There is a lot of talk – and usually just talk – about depression and its devastating effects – usually on women. It seems that men – especially divorced fathers are supposed to be immune from depression.
Nobody really cares about depressed fathers. I could share with you the frightening statistics about how many fathers every year are driven to suicide by the depression caused by their systemic psychological, emotional, and financial destruction at the hands of the ‘Family Courts’. I won’t do that however. I will just share with you a vignette about one divorced father who suffered through one such debilitating depressive episode. The father was me.
I know personally what it is to suffer severe depression and grief symptoms. After being abused by my wife verbally, psychologically, and physically for many years and after she threatened to kill me I went to a social agency for help. Instead of keeping my plight confidential, they immediately informed my wife who then immediately filed for divorce.
After being humiliated and ridiculed in court by the judge for complaining about the abuse since I was a ‘big guy’ he ordered me out of the house, in the middle of a Canadian winter and gave sole custody of my children to my wife, effectively cutting off all contact with them. I was in such a state of shock that I got in my car, and in the middle of a raging winter drove, alone, for days, 3500 km all the way across Canada to my parents’ home on the other side of the country.
As I was driving these thousands of km, alone, through the trackless Canadian wilderness in the middle of the winter, I was numb, barely functioning, shocked into a state of grief beyond anything I had ever known or even conceived of.
For all intents and purposes my children had been murdered by this judge – for that was how I felt – my children were gone – my children for whom I had endured so much abuse for so many years – my children for whom I would do anything – my children to whom I had dedicated my life. I sank into deep despair and became exhausted beyond endurance but not able to sleep, experienced bouts of extreme rage, all interaction with other people and with the outside world just stopped, my body essentially shut down. In this totally disconnected stupor I somehow made it to my childhood home, to my family.
For days, weeks, I lay curled into a foetal ball, sunk into a deep black hole from which I saw no hope of ever escaping. My health deteriorated. I was prescribed a number of medications to try to pull me out of this ever deepening depression.
Then after a long while, I fought back. It took years but through my own efforts I eventually got my children back and raised them as a single father, without outside help or support from any person, any agency, any government – without help from any other human being. Whenever I think about it I am thrust back into those dark days. My whole body & being ache again with the same searing pain I had experienced so many years before. There is no pain like the loss of a child – you do not ever recover from it – you simply try to endure it.